7 Signs to Identify a Toxic Relationship

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Relationships can be challenging. A relationship may start out totally healthy, but over time, unhealthy habits may start to occur, changing the dynamic of the relationship. Such toxic relationship can negatively affect every aspect of your life: your business, your physical health, and your mental stability.




What is a toxic relationship?


A toxic relationship is able to control your emotions and makes you feel extreme highs and lows. It often happens when one or both parties show signs of manipulative behavior due to past relationships or trauma. It can happen easily and quickly, and to the strongest people.



The signs of a toxic relationship


1. Everything is about them


Can you choose what movie to watch or where to go for dinner in this relationship? Or you are afraid to say “no?” Toxic people want to be in control of every decision, no matter how small it is. They may pretend to care about your feelings, but it turns out that you can never make simple choices yourselves.



2. They are jealous or controlling


Does your partner constantly go through your receipts, phone bills and text messages? Does he or she get suspicious when you're out with other people? If so, these mean your partner do not trust you. Everybody deserves trust and some level of privacy.


3. You feel exhausted or drained


When spending time with a toxic person, you may feel emotionally exhausted. You may feel like all the work, love and compromise come from you. Stop. Just stop doing so. You’ve already done enough.



4. They don't respect your boundaries


Toxic person may constantly push and overstep boundaries, leaving you with an overwhelming sense of self-doubt and frustration. Due to this behavior, you might find yourself questioning your strength, values and self-worth.


5. They isolate you from friends and family


If your partner discourages you from seeing those close to you, that's a major red flag. In the initial stages, you might find it sweet that someone wants to spend so much time with you. But overtime, this can isolate you from your friends and family.



6. They are manipulative, expecting you to always do what they want


Manipulative behavior plays with your emotions and makes you feel guilty. A toxic person will dismiss your opinions and feelings to ultimately get you to do what they want, making you out to be the bad person.


7. You feel trapped in the relationship


Feeling like you are trapped? Finding it difficult to escape can cause more grief and heartache than staying in a toxic relationship. But don’t give up, try to remember that there's always a way out, even in the most toxic relationships.




I think I might be in a toxic relationship. What now?


Some people might not realize that their actions are hurting you, so try telling the other person how you are feeling and how their behavior is affecting you by using 'I feel…' statements. If this is not useful, it’s time to leave and work to be a better individual. Always remember to love yourself!

1 Answer

These messages are for mutual support and information sharing only. Always consult your doctor before trying anything you read here.
I'm in an extremely toxic relationship. However due to so many variables, I feel kinda obligated to stay. More so because of medical, mental and addiction my mate has acquired over the years. It's almost like I'm worried about what will happen if I were to just walk away. Due to the distaste his family has for me, I don't want the old "I told you so" to be thrown in his face. Even though that isn't the case at all. I've stayed through physical emotional, verbal, and mental abuse... Extreme abuse. So now I'm stuck in a constant war with myself. How do I walk away without feeling guilty. You would think it would be a breeze with the constant and daily verbal abuse that endure in front of any and everyone. Can someone please help

P.S. He's 20 years older than me. We had 4 children together. Our first two passed away. We've been married for 6 years and together for 12.
I too have been in a toxic relationship for 25 years. Although we have never been married which was my choice.  I felt that if I did that he would have total control of my life. This year I decided it was time for me to be happy. He too has medical problems, financial problems, has recently lost his mother and son. I worried about what people would think of me if I left him. I worried about what would happen to him. But I did it!  I was so surprised how much support I got from people I thought would be critical. People see more than you think. He manipulated me with suicide threats, guilt, you name it. Played the poor me card constantly. I went to counseling and through an unbiased persons eyes I began to understand how he operated and how to shut that down. She helped me to see I wasn’t responsible for his problems and deserved to be happy. Step by step I got the strength to set boundaries for his behavior, to tell him how I have felt all these years and finally walk away. It isn’t as easy as people think. Read up on traumatic bonding. It will help you see why this is so hard for people like us. I encourage you to seek counseling. I avoided it but it really helped me along the way, gave me a person who would tell me if I was wrong or right not just what I wanted to hear and helped me to understand myself as well as him. It has been a journey and it isn’t over yet but one I am glad I started. If I can do it so can you!  Good luck to you!  Positive thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
If you were smart. You would run like hell. You are just wasting your life on an egotistical ass whole. Get out now while you still have a little respect for yourself.
Hi, I am a Relationship and Life Coach I want you to know that you are "NOT" responsible for anyone's issues but your owe; this includes "Medical Conditions" or otherwise. This man made it long before you came into his life and he will make it if you leave. Learn to love yourself enough to let go of what's not working and know that this is toxic. The only option that matters is yours,  Life cannot begin until you allow it to.
So true. I was married to an alcoholic, selfish, manipulative, mentally abusive man for 25 years. Mercifully, he died, but now, 9 years later, he is still controlling me from the grave via his damn Will and Trust fund. Still no peace. Get out now before he takes you with him! Learn to love yourself and be happy. Life is too short to waste it on someone else’s bullshit.
I have known this person for 20 years, he is a alcoholic and is mentally abusive to me. I have lived with him for a year. But have plans to move as soon as my Apt is ready. They're building a 55+. Which I can only afford. But won't be done till June. I'm holding my breath till then. He makes me feel worthless and calls me trash. I don't see him being any better even though he was raised with money. We are the same, I might've not had money growing up but I'm better than that.
How does this advice really make sense? Yeah okay, why don't you treat someone like shit because they are already putting up with taking shit! "If you were smart"?? Seriously? Does it really make sense to bully someone who needs encouragement? Sorry your life has not gone well.